Reviews

A partial and unordered list of the top 10 best feelings

  1. revenge
  2. waking up and realizing you can sleep more
  3. peeing after you have held it for a long time
  4. someone telling you that they love you
  5. accomplishing something
  6. feeling small
  7. fighting in a revolution and winning
  8. the sexy times
  9. getting into a bed with clean sheets
  10. hotel beds
  11. returning to your bed after a trip
  12. concerts
  13. being at the front
  14. Doing dumb stuff, together

Six questions to fall in love

  1. What is the story of the time you had to pee the most?
  2. Were you a Disney or Nickelodeon kid?
  3. How do you feel about Citizens United v. FEC?
  4. How good do you think you would be at sexing chickens?
  5. Were you a cesarean or a vaginal birth?
  6. What's the dumbest thing you've for a boy/girl/assorted other?
  7. Should you celebrate Christmas before Thanksgiving?
  8. Were you a nerdfighter?
  9. How many?

201 Roommates

Jo: the sweetest surprise, good level of clean, has a 15% discount at greenstar, asks first, the GREATEST site supporter, the purveyor of truth on chicken, 17, good at Friday morning memes in bed

Juliette: she is so great at living but does she exist during the mornings?

Chaska: the CLEANEST

Puppo: can sometimes sit, often pees on the floor, has the CUTEST walk, EIGHT

Sarah: can always sit, sometimes pees on the floor, has the second CUTEST walk, A+

Nick: See Exhibit A

Exhibit A

Chairs

Chaska: Good for sitting.

Sarah: B out of 7

Fingers

Thumb

Pretty good. Shorter than the others. Opposable (that means you can take it off right?). Good for the thumbs up and thumbs dow. Cannot sit inside nose. Pretty ugly but can be sucked on. 7.3/10 (also good for texting)

Index

Fuck index funds! 1/5

Middle

Expressive; sometimes a little to0 much. B+

Ring

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... 34%

Pinky

I feel similarly about the pinky as I do about Pluto, and Jeb Bush, I wish you were relevant but you're not. Pls clap.

Guy Fieri

AAA, we aren't convinced you can cook, but your fashion sense is impeccable.